it's me or you that's suppose to not to give up on something we think should give up to?

hey,
I'm going out later to buy a gift for my mom,
it's her birthday today,
these days,
many people told me that I'm emo,
am i really that emo?
i guess it's because of him,
i lied,
when I'm bored i don't get emo,
it's actually,
when i miss someone,
i get emo,
he's not just an ordinary boy,
he's special that leaves a mark at your heart,
he's just so hard to forget,
normally,
any other guys I'll just play with their relationship,
but this is different,
he makes me special and i just cant hurt him more,
when I'm with him,
i don't get why I'd be like this,
I'm missing him,
and many of my friends gave me advise that,
eventually I'll get over him,
but it's not that easy as it seems,
and it's not that simple to forget everything that he had done,
everything that is,
nice,
why is he bringing me down?
i was so happy that i gave up on him,
i was so glad that I'm single,
but now i felt,
missed?
i wonder how is his life now,
i bet he is happy living without me,
i just want to know what you feel about me now,
I'm just so desperate to know,
at least i could tell myself that you miss me too,
so yeah,
i don't know how to find a way to not to miss him,
how i wished you could read this,
but I'm just so afraid that you would not like it,
you know,
sometimes when guys get over someone,
they'll hope the girl wont bother their life anymore,
I'm scared that you're this kind of person,
that's why i didn't show you this,
i miss you,
i truly do,
if we meet each other,
would it be awkward?
would it still be HI,
or just ignore?
or maybe just frown,
and unable to smile to each other,
would it be like this?
we used to had it all,
i don't know how could we fall,
it's me or you,
that's suppose to give up on what we should not be giving up?
sometimes,
it's not that wonderful as it seems to be single,
you'll miss those who lastly you had relationship with,
i guess that's why I'm emo,
i cant think of anything that is happy,
to make me get rid of emo,
and him,
i guess all i can do,
is do something,
that could make full of my mind,
so that i don't have to remember him all the time,
i set my target,
to forget him when school starts,
so yeah,
there's about 1 more week,
success or failing is up to me,
to try,
or not to forget about him,
later guys,
bye.